I’ll Hint The Championship F*xtures Your Way

Don't mention the F word!

You may have been on EPL talk this morning and read The Gaffer’s blog, which tells you that 2010 is the year that f*xture lists have become a commodity. It seems that now the Bundesliga has taken over the Premiership as the richest league in the word, they’re clawing onto any money they can, and no doubt there will be a few independent bloggers caught out. To be fair though, I was about to list the opening day f*xtures on this website until I caught The Gaffer’s article via Twitter, I went onto an unofficial Newcastle United website to see when we’ll play Sunderland next season and I did wonder why they put a copyright at the bottom of the fixtures. In any case, I find fixture day one of the most over-hyped days in English football. It’s nice to see who you’ll play first and when your derby games are, but it’s hardly novel that you’ll be playing every team twice across the season. If you’re one of these odd people Sky have caught at 9am to talk about their excitement regarding their team’s f*xtures, then you’ll probably know every game off heart and will not see this blog because you’ll be too busy in a dark room studying the list. I still think I can do the opening day, so instead of “f*xtures”, I’m going to use the term “opening day battles”. See if you can get who your team is “battling” on the opening day:

1. It looks like those boys will be driving their tractors down up to the Riverside t0 take on the Scotsman’s boys.

2. The capital of Wales hosts the capital of steel!

3. There will be swans floating around the Humber bridge, but the tigers will be on the prowl.

4. The clarets look set to lay down the law when they find the forest around them.

5. Delia Smith welcomes Elton John for a feast of football.

6. The rams go marching on together in a united Yorkshire.

7. For the first time in history a robin will be favourite to beat a lion.

8. The irons can expect a royal welcome when they travel down south.

9. The north end is being invaded by vikings!

10. Law instilling monarchs look to fend off some feisty tykes.

11. A clear place for royalty has a fox problem.

12. The sky will be blue, but a darker shade will look to play up to the occasion.

Remember – I am in no way suggesting that this has anything to do with the Championship or the F word. These are battles, that will all occur on the 7th August and possibly the 6th, 8th and 9th depending on television. In any case, there’s a World Cup on!

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