Hey Mark Wahlberg – Dis Beckham All You Want, But Leave Soccer Alone

marky mark

In a long and completely boring interview with London’s Daily Mail, Marky Mark Wahlberg had this to say about his neighbor David Beckham:

Man, the Beckhams. It used to be so quiet on my road. Then David moves in with his family. Suddenly we’ve got paparazzi hanging out day and night. Now they’ll follow any car that drives down the road….I’m not telling Beckham to take his family home. I’m just not sure why he came to America in the first place. Man, we don’t want your soccer. There’s no way Americans are going to buy the idea of 90 minutes of running around without much happening. Thanks for trying guys, but we’ll stick to baseball and basketball.

Hey Marky – say what you want about Beckham, but there is no reason to insult the most popular sport in the world.  There are millions of soccer fans in the United States, and I don’t see any of them telling you how to avoid sounding like a lobotomized chimpanzee when delivering your lines.  Besides, if I wanted to spend 90 minutes watching someone run around without much action, I would have plunked down $9.50 to see you in that piece of excrement The Happening this summer.

26 thoughts on “Hey Mark Wahlberg – Dis Beckham All You Want, But Leave Soccer Alone”

    1. thats my first thought…we all know baseball is the most boring sport out there lol marky mark needs 2 be quiet..u dont have to like soccer but dont bash it….to each his own…..damn dis made me mad tho u see more people playing soccer in the world then baseball and basketball put together…hes kinda ignorant shut up mark hes just jealous he dont get paparrazi like beckham because in his own country beckham is more popular than him i mean come on GOO SOCCER

        1. lol ok u got me but as i typed i juss got madder and accidently contradicted myself lmao but i mean to each his own but mant people say baseball is boring it kinda is

    1. There you go. The obsession with relevance and the presumption to determine who is or isn’t relevant. Can’t you see that the breezy, cocky, supposedly hip arbitrariness of soccer fans can be grating?

  1. I’m with you, guys. But we’d all be better served to examine our sport with the idea of determining why it continues to invite jest. Lash it out at the critics all you want but by doing so you’re living up to the stereotype of the aggrieved soccer fan.

    1. Ah yes, the “let’s change the world’s most popular sport to conform to our American expectations for spoon-fed entertainment” concern troll. Love you, man.

      1. I didn’t say that. Consider, so, the promptness with which American soccer fans demonize the soccer-averse, reach conclusions and advertise their supposed sanctity. The presumed moral and superiority of American soccer fans asks to be mocked. Even MLS with its lame commitment to domestic “human rights” makes a cheap stab at hipster relevance and begs to be satirized.

  2. Oh wow first he degrades futbol for time consumption and no action i.e. scoring and then in the next breathe commends baseball as quick and exciting. Now I love baseball, played it, but 2 and a half hours of a 1-0 pitchers dual is not exactly an action filled afternoon is it? Now some would say you have to know the sport to appreciate a 2 + hour pitchers dual to which I say you have to know futbol to apprecate a 90 minute 1-nil match. So maybe he should stick to bad scripts, stiff acting or learn the game and then comment. Typical self important celeb.

  3. Shouldn’t Marky Mark view this as good news? Now there’s actually a chance that the paparazzi will follow him — at least until that figure out that it’s him, and not Beckham, in the car.

  4. DB, you can’t do any better than Mark Wahlberg’s neighborhood.
    More people are fans of the Fiji soccer league in Arkansas ( apologies to anyone living there ) than follow him.

  5. “Besides, if I wanted to spend 90 minutes watching someone run around without much action, I would have plunked down $9.50 to see you in that piece of excrement The Happening this summer.”

    LOL!! Nice :)

    What a tool. And what trite arguments – oh really, it’s boring? Not enough goals? Gee, I sure haven’t heard those complaints a million damn times! I wonder if he’s ever even watched a real soccer game? Most people I’ve encountered who shit-talk it end up admitting they’ve never seen a game beyond some local high school or something. Anyone who could watch Chelsea or Barcelona or whoever play and think it’s boring is obviously insane, so we don’t need to listen to them anyway.

    Ugh, American nationalists annoy me. (And yes, I’m American. But I’m not a world-hating douche like Wahlberg.)

  6. Wow. So much angst about what Mark Wahlberg thinks about the sport we love. My assumption is already that every American already hates soccer. That way, when I meet someone that loves it like I do, it’s a pleasant surprise. And that way when someone like Wahlberg spouts off, I’m unsurprised.

    It’s a little cynical, I know.

  7. I enjoy how the article was written directly to Mark. If te guy ever had any inclination to read a post on this site, he wou’dn’t have said what he did in the first place. This should have been posted on MLB-talk not MLS-talk (I’m randomly assuming such a site exists). That way , ya know–he could be made properly aware of what you’re trying to tell him and stuff.

  8. MLS? Sorry, but this is not real football. Guys, let’s start watching european leagues (Primiera Division, Premier League…) – this is football! Everyone who doesn’t like this sport, after watching eg. Real – Barcelona or Man U – Chelsea will change his mind.

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