Practically every weekend of the Premier League is filled with so much emotion, wonderful skills and excitement that you have to wonder whether it’s better than sex at times?

Consider other entertainment mediums. Books are great but no matter how suspenseful they are they’re already pre-written. You can turn to the last few pages and instantly find out what happened. The same goes for movies which you can skip to the last chapter to find out how they ended. But with sports, and specifically the Premier League, no one knows what’s going to happen and how the drama will unfold. It’s a form of entertainment that is better than any script because it’s unscripted.

So I jotted down a few instances where watching Premier League matches are better than sex, and here they are:

  • Guaranteed two hours of entertainment,
  • The TV won’t talk back to you,
  • No spooning required,
  • You can drink beer during it,
  • It’s almost always a happy ending,
  • Your team almost always scores, sometimes more than once,
  • Games are almost always on, with or without headaches.

Now whether watching Premier League matches is better than sex depends on how your sex life is. Without getting too graphic, there’s no better feeling than sex. But a lot of that depends on you and your partner. But given the highs of your team winning a trophy and the rush of adrenaline, I can see how Premier League football can be better than sex.

What do you think? What examples am I missing from the above bulletpoints where watching Premier League matches can be better than sex?