If I have learned anything in my first year of reading EPL Talk it is that we are all subject to the whims of our TV providers whether they be cable, FiOS, DSL or satellite. You want Fox Soccer Plus? Well, let me see. “We value the input of all our customers……..”

Right. Tell me another one. Being a Time Warner Cable (TWC) prisoner …errr customer, my favorite line is their “The power of you” tagline. The power to what? Switch? Too many trees for satellite, unless I hire Paul Bunyan. DSL? FiOS? “We should be with you in 2015.” So there you are. TWC or bust.

But what does that mean? If you have followed the postings on EPL Talk it is obvious that we subscribers to any service have little idea what “normal” service means. Each company seems to have its own set of rules. For instance, in one of the greatest misunderstandings, Time Warner does not offer “National” service. They let their regional managers decide whether or not to offer special channels like Fox Soccer Plus or whether to go HD on anything. So, TWC line-ups are different all over the country. Comcast? Brighthouse? Charter? I have no clue. You tell me.

DirecTV and Dish seem to have a different business model entirely, but not always better. For instance, I get Fox Soccer Plus at no extra charge, but my understanding is that DirecTV customers must pay a premium for the same service that I get for “free.” I really do hate to use old clichés, but…..Whazupwiddat?!

My question to you, dear readers is, in this jungle we are all trying to maneuver through, what are the best ….and worst things about YOUR service, including pricing? What would make it “perfect”? Like you have a chance.

P.S. My apologies for cutting out our UK readers. I love you guys. You could always chime in with what spoiled-rotten-little-Yank-brats we are…..or your own particular provider problems. Hey, you might even make us feel better!