This last weekend, I had to miss the mouthwatering season start fixtures and had to move houses. So here is my late report based on the highlights I was able to catch online.

Geovanni

I cant believe this fellow was released by Manchester City. Facing their mini personnel crisis and lack of funds, I have no idea why City deemed him as surplus so early in the transfer season. (He is Brazilian for God’s sake!!). That screamer he scored against Fulham was out of the world. I know what you are gonna say, but a goal against Fulham is still a goal my friends. Also considering Hull’s impending struggle to stay up, a goal is going to be worth 2 points. This could have been the earliest relegation six-pointer game of the season.

I heard he was released for a lack of discipline and disruptive activities, but hey, the current city gaffer got the best out of Craig Bellamy!! if he cant get the best out of Geovanni, I don’t know who can!! Could I have a round of sarcastic applause for Man City here??

Newcastle United

A draw against the same United side that humiliated them last season is impressive whichever way you look at it. I still remember reading forum posts where many had a field day rebuking the goal celebrations of the Argentinian Spider Man wannabe. So who’s laughing now?? This is just the first game but things look good for Newcastle. The jury’s still out on the Newcastle defense though, as Man Utd hardly tested their rearguard and Fletcher of all people popped in to score a cheeky one past them. They are still 3 good players short of challenging for anything serious though.

Roman Abramovich

Portuguese full back -15 million

Portugese playmaker – 8 million

Portuguese national team Manager – (don’t know.. but I am sure Scolari can buy all writers and readers here 20 rounds of the most expensive beer in the world with his current pay cheque)

Expression on Abramovich’s face – priceless..(not really.. Id rather many many other things in the world.. but whatever)

and they say money can’t buy you happiness. (This is why I am not in Marketing)

Tottenham

Something is wrong.. I think what Tottenham need is not world class players but a witch doctor to change their luck. Daniel Levy if you are reading, I am available to change your fortunes for $5000 a week. But I know you wont sign me, cause I am unattached so I wont cost a buck in transfer fees and I know how much you like to throw around your money in transfer fees. You could try to find some decent defenders though. I am sorry did Modric play the game??

That own goal by Robert Huth was the most awesome goal of the match. He just needs to start trying that backward header at the other end of the pitch now. Also, Kudos to Mr. Mido, way to deflate your previous club dude.

Torres and Nasri

Too much said about both. The big 4 do get way more coverage than the other guys don’t they?? Also Alonso seems to be moving his weight much more now.. coincidence?? I don’t think so. I think Benitez has no plans of signing Mr.Barry anymore. He is just going to take us on a wild goose chase for a while and have Alonso play his socks off. Hats off to Senor Benitez.

Blackburn

I expected Blackburn to implode after the mass exodus of their personnel, but this is exactly why I should stop making predictions and stay away from the stock markets and truth or dare games. I never saw Paul Ince play and I never knew him as a manager, but one game isn’t everything right?? I wanna see Villanueva play.. are you listening Mr.Ince??

By the way I consider Arteta’s (who was magnificent by the way) free kick goal to be another gaffe by Paul Robinson. If he cant judge the flight of that free kick at your his post, I don’t know what to say.

Gabor/Gabriel Agbonlahor & Aston Villa

7 minute hat trick, scintillating goal fest, more reason for Benitez, Wenger (and Stevie G) to ogle at Barry. Alonso would have to try to score more goals from the other side of the half line. Somehow Agbonlahor is still not good enough to make the England team. As a forward what else can you do other than a 7 min hat trick?? ooh 3 goals and chicken biriyani for Mr.Capello within 7 minutes??

Ok, that’s all I cant type now, I need to write some code now, but I promise I will write better articles on what happens next weekend as I actually plan to see the games.