FRI, 2:30PM ET
MAR
NAN
FRI, 2:30PM ET
SOC
ELC
FRI, 2:30PM ET
FRE
STU
SAT, 7:45AM ET
WBA
ARS
SAT, 10AM ET
MUFC
HULL
SAT, 10AM ET
SWA
CRY

Mislead Zeppelin

BurnleyBlimp 736727 Mislead Zeppelin

Please contact the Lancashire Police at 0800 555 111 with any information regarding Burnley’s missing blimp, photographed here. Much like the Clarets’ recent home form, the aircraft has escaped Turf Moor, and bears a striking resemblance to Diego Maradona. Speculation persists that at this point, the Identified Inflatable Object could even have departed England, and is headed abroad. In light of QPR’s potential involvement, and the West London club’s ties to influential Italian families, you need not leave your name at the Crime Stopper’s hotline number listed above in order to protect the innocent.

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